Goodbye

I am angry. I am so angry I’m saying goodbye to blogging for now. I dont want to write anything that I might regret so I’m going to write all the hatred in a diary.

I feel so used. Betrayed. And I have never felt this way in my entire existence. And that one person made me feel like I was the biggest fool in this world. I have my ups and downs but this one beats ‘em all. You took everything away from me. My pride, happiness, trust and love. I dont know if I can be myself again.

I’m not gonna be updating anything right now even my facebook account. I just need time to get everything back. Im trying to get my pride back. Im now trying to gain confidence and happiness. I’m trying to love myself again.

from lexie…

“Part of the fantasy of every betrayed person is that one day the person who hurt you will come back and answer all your questions and apologize for hurting you. But the thing is…they wont. They’ll die a liar and will feel feel good about themselves. That’s how selfish they are. They cant give you closure, you have to find it yourself. You get angry with them. Then you get over them.
Bless them in your mind and have peace with yourself. When or if that person comes back, you can say Hi and Goodbye at the same time”—Oprah Winfrey

For the record…

Hmm…this is a nice song from Mariah Carey…hehehe

For the record
You oughta know
You wasn’t thinking
When you let me go

But whatever
That’s how it goes
Win some you lose some
And others you hold in your heart

Why it gets so hard
Tears you all apart
Even though you try to let go
No, no, no

Suddenly you’re here
And it’s so surreal
And I don’t know
What the deal

Cause when I’m looking in your eyes
Feels like the first time
Give me one good reason why
We can’t just press rewind
I don’t wanna spend my life
Thinking what it could’ve been like
If we had another try (one time)
Like back in the day
That look on your face
Feels like, the first time

You’ll always be a part of me
No matter what you do
And for the record
Can’t nobody say
I didn’t give my all to you

And for the record
I told you underneath the stars
That you belong to me
For the record
It’s obvious that
We just can’t let go of us, honey

Cause when I’m looking in your eyes
Feels like the first time
Give me one good reason why
We can’t just press rewind
I don’t wanna spend my life
Thinking what it could’ve been like
If we had another try (one time)
Like back in the day
That look on your face
Feels like, the first time

Cause when I’m looking in your eyes
Feels like the first time
Give me one good reason why
We can’t just press rewind
I don’t wanna spend my life
Thinking what it could’ve been like
If we had another try (one time)
Like back in the day
That look on your face
Feels like, the first time

For the record, baby
Now you know, baby

Sorry

I’m sorry if I’ve said some things that had hurt anyone. There are times I let my temper control me. I’m sorry if I get upset with small things. I am too emotional although I know what’s right and wrong, I just can’t help letting people know how I feel.

So i’m sorry and hope you get to read this. I dont have any right to be like that towards you but I got so insulted I couldnt think straight. You know how I feel about everything.

ALL I CAN SAY IS…

Say you’re sorry
That face of an angel
Comes out just when you need it to
As I paced back and forth all this time
Cause I honestly believed in you
Holding on
The days drag on
Stupid girl,
I should have known, I should have known

[Chorus]
I’m not a princess, this ain’t a fairy tale
I’m not the one you’ll sweep off her feet,
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain’t Hollywood, this is a small town,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it’s too late for you
And your white horse, to come around

Baby I was naive,
Got lost in your eyes
And never really had a chance
My mistake, I didn’t wanna be in love
You had to fight to have the upper hand
I had so many dreams
About you and me
Happy endings
Now I know

[Chorus]
I’m not a princess, this ain’t a fairy tale
I’m not the one you’ll sweep off her feet,
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain’t Hollywood, this is a small town,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it’s too late for you
And your white horse, to come around